The Christmas Boss

by | Dec 8, 1994 | Stories | 1 comment

I saw these two men dressed in black. They both had large burlap bags thrown over their shoulders and they didn’t look fat and jolly or anything. Their bags were full of stuff, I could tell. Lots of things, and I know there was jewlery in there because I could hear it rattling. I was waiting to see what they would pull out of their bags next, maybe a doll, candy, a playhouse,
a horse, or some of that jewlery. But, then I saw them put a package in the bag. I was totally confused. Why would Santa take presents away? Maybe they weren’t mine and he put them out by mistake or something. Then he put another gift in the bag, and another! I was getting scared because almost all my presents were gone. So, I got the nerve and walked into the living
room. I said, “Santa, why are you taking away all my presents? Are they not mine?”

He stopped and looked at me, a gift in his hand, and smiled. He paused for a moment and finally said, “No, these presents aren’t for you. They were delivered here by mistake.” He looked at his other friend, maybe they were elves or something. “But, we can take you to find your real presents,” he said excitedly.

Wow! I could go with the elves to find my presents! I bet they were at the north pole in some big warehouse where Santa gets all his toys. Maybe I could even meet Santa!

“Well… Yea,” I told them. “That would be cool!” At that moment, they picked me up and threw me in an empty bag. They tied it shut, and it was dark and itchy, but I could breathe. This sure was weird, I thought maybe they had a sleigh or something with reindeer but they put me in the trunk of a car along with all the other bags. We drove around for about 30 or so minutes, and we were there! The north pole! I couldn’t wait to see it.

I bet it would be all cool with white snow as far as you could see and little elves everywhere making their toys and all these buildings, and even Santa’s house in the distance. But, it turned out they had already taken me into their warehouse because when they untied the bag, and I stuck my head out, I could see thousands of bags all filled with presents and a lot of these little elves dressed in black outfits and such running around as fast as they could. They were all carrying these big toy guns, and they even tried some of them out on each other, after yelling real loudly about it, and they were real loud and sounded like the ones on tv. And, It was really funny because then the guy would start screaming and everyone would duck and he would fall to the ground clutching his chest, but I didn’t laugh because no one else laughed. It must not have been too funny.

Then I heard one of them say, “Hey! It’s the boss!” and they all turned around and looked at this guy comming. He was real big, and fat and he blew his somke out of this long pipe looking thing and he laughed real jolly like when he saw the guy on the floor. He started pointing and jumping up and down and screaming and all, it was great. Santa’s really a nice guy.

Then, Santa said “So, you boys ready for your Christmas Presents?”

And they all said, “Yea, boss! Yea!” And they started all waving their toy guns and everything. Santa looked in a nearby bag, and took out a really big present. He looked at it carefully, and said, “To Doug. This is to you, Billy.” Santa didn’t have his glasses on, so I guess he just gave the present to who he wanted to. He threw the present over to one of the elves who caught it and opened it quickly. It was a big train set!

With the engine and all the cars and track and everything, even little people. I think he really liked it. He continued through all the elves and they all had the coolest presents, I wish I had some of them.

Then, when Santa was finished, one of the elves that was at my house said, “Hey, Boss! We got YOU a present!” Santa asked what it was. “He’s right here!” And he pointed to me! Santa looked at me and blew a puff a smoke.

He put his finger aside of his nose, and gave a little wink. He started walking towards me! Ohhh Santa comming to meet me! I get to talk to Santa! I didn’t know what to say, so I just stood there as he stood above me. Santa was big, and he smelled like my daddy after he and my mom go out to the bars. And, then he laughed really jolly like and walked away. He said to package me up and send me down the river. And then, one of the elves threw a burlap bag over me and tied it again. He put me in the back seat of one of their cars and we took off.

So, here I sit. In the back seat of one of Santa’s cars. The elf driving me has the music really loud listening to Jingle Bell Rock and we are going real fast and everything. I wonder when Santa will give me my presents?