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by RadialMonster | Jan 25, 2007 | General

Tonight, I wrote a little something to a blogger that is currently 93 years old.  Take some time to read his site, the link is below.  I’ve posted my comments here as they give a little insight into myself also.

http://dontoearth.blogspot.com/2007/01/it-bothers-me-that-i-have-to-go.html

You’ve been dugg, i’m sure you already realize that by now. http://digg.com/offbeat_news/93_year_old_blogger_It_Bothers_Me_That_I_Have_To_Go
I’m 29 years old myself. I do not have a ‘fear’ of dying, I don’t think. I mean, I fear being in pain, being in a bad situation, being in a trajedy that would cause me to die. But death itself, I don’t know that I fear. However, I DO fear the things that are left undone. The things that I still want to do, feel like I need to do. I fear dying alone. I fear that I may not accomplish what I want to accomplish, that I will not be remembered, or that my existance will not matter to anyone. I wish you well on your journey, whatever accomplishments you still feel like you need to do. You will be remembered, here in the online world at least. And your words do matter to thousands of people.
Take care

Phil

princess

by RadialMonster | Jan 19, 2007 | General

I feel like Mario.  Every time I get to the end, I’m only, yet again, told “I’m sorry, but your princess is in another castle.”  So, I’m waiting at the loading screen for the next stage.  Except, right now, it’s just blank.

Holiday Updates

by RadialMonster | Jan 11, 2007 | General

Christmas and New Years was good for me, just saw my family, hung out with all my friends.  I did get the new camera I was wanting, a FujiFilm f30 model.  Sample pics are below:

Gadita the Tiger

Christmas Day Puppies

Me with Chloe

New Years Eve night O games

More Gadita

A girl and her banana

Tim pondering

Other than wasting time taking pictures, I’ve wasted a lot more time on all the personal sites again.  Whoring myself out there, another doll on the shelf.  Already met some great people, but nothing consistent.  If you ladies are playing the hard to get game you’ve already won as I won’t play.  It’s hard for me to tell if a lady’s flirting or just being friendly.  It’s got to be pretty obvious to me.  Is the waitress taking extra special care of me because she’s interested, or she’s hoping for a good tip?  So, let me know, or I’ll assume otherwise and move on.  Of course I’ve already been in touch with several scammers.  You know, those ‘russian brides’ who profess their love to you then ask for money to help thier sick momma.  Or the hot girls who want to chat, if you get on their for pay webcam.  The occasional dude who says ‘if you don’t find what you’re looking for i’m available’.  no thanks guy.  I got lonely, knew the game already from past experience, and decided to play with russian bride game this time.  She emailed introducing herself, of course including some incredibly hot pictures.  I googled up a known russian blacklist site, found the next already written e-mail that she would be sending and I sent that to her as my reply.  She didn’t catch on, she fired off another email to me, to which I have yet to reply.  I’ve gotten a few follow up e-mails asking how I am and why haven’t I written.  I’m going to write back and say my family had an emergency and I need some money, baby.  Or maybe I’ll say I have a business trip to Russia and am ready to meet.  Anyway, I’ll play the game for a little while just to waste their time.  Here’s the last e-mail she sent:

Dear Phil! Thanks for your e-mail . I did not inform you earlier Phil
the address because it is not enough knew you. I live in average area
of Russia, in city Obninsk. To regret it is far from you, differently
it was not necessary for us much e-mail, to find out each other. We
could meet, talk, to spend some time together and it is quite good to
find out each other. But for us it will be not a fast way. But I hope,
that it will not be problem for us if we shall decide to make it in
the future. I already made some travel to other countries. I
travelled, as the tourist, to Europe. Therefore Phil , you should not
have excitements of that is present distance between us. I such woman,
that if I shall like the person for a meeting with him, I shall reach
even on the moon. In our days is not a problem to make such travel. I
not I worry about it and even I have devoted feelings, having got
acquainted with The person on the other hand. For me it is very
interesting feelings- To find out the person with other culture,
thinking, traditions. It One of things - which draws me to you. Not
the main thing,- But new and interesting. Probably if our relations
will be strong and you Phil, you can find out the mysterious Russian
woman. I hope, that for you it is interesting to find out and test
love of such woman? I think, dear Phil That you cannot resist to mine
for a long time female magic, If happen so, that we shall be the
person to To the person.On it I finish my message to you Phil. I to
send you other my photo.

I wait for your messages. Yours Olga.

Otherwise, haven’t been doing a whole lot, my mind is too pre-occupied.  Lots of ideas of things to create, but just can’t get into that phase.  The ideal thing for me is to have a partner who can help me, be with me, entice and inspire me to create.  Someone that understands the tools of creation, not be jealous of them. If that doesn’t happen soon I’m sure i’ll get comfortable where I am and create anyway just as before.  The content would be different I’m sure.  But, that’s ok.  Been playing the piano and guitar a lot more too, maybe I can catch back up on years of neglect and write some music again.   Well, all for now.  time for bed.